WHAT WEEDS ARE IN YOUR GARDEN?
I make it a habit of regularly listening to and reading books to make my marriage better. Even though I have been married over thirty years, I have discovered there is always something I can learn from someone else’s wisdom. Some books have impacted me enough that I will go through them multiple times. Currently, I am reviewing What Did You Expect? Redeeming the Realities of Marriage by Paul David Tripp. Consider this quote from the book:
"Why is it that we don’t expect our gardens to just grow by themselves – yet we expect our marriages to blossom beautifully without the daily work of pulling up weeds and planting seeds? I must confess that I don’t get it. I don’t know why we think that the most comprehensive and long-term of all human relationships can stay alive and thrive without the same commitment we make to our gardens. Perhaps one of the fundamental sins that we all commit in our marriages is the sin of inattention… Is your marriage in some way a picture of neglect? Was it planted well? Has it been weeded and watered with regularity? Have you lacked the motivation to do the hard work of seeding and weeding and then stood back wondering why things don't look prettier than they do?” Pg. 101.
"[Many marriages are weedy, choking the life and love out of a marriage. We all are…] "weedy" people who need to pull personal and relational weeds daily so that the flowers of love and grace may grow. Sinners (which, in case you forgot, all of us are) always drag their sin into their marriages. Weeds of thought, decision, desire, motivation, word, action [and in action] cannot be completely avoided this side of heaven, so pulling weeds in the necessary commitment of any good marriage." Pg. 104.
My first response was: “OUCH!” If I am to love my wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25), then I need to actively create the proper environment for the garden of my marriage to grow and thrive. I need to own the condition of my garden. I need to weed my garden of my selfishness and sinfulness. Romans 14:19 states, “So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.” The challenge to myself and all of you is: “What weeds are in your garden?” Commit to identify them and commit to remove them.
"Why is it that we don’t expect our gardens to just grow by themselves – yet we expect our marriages to blossom beautifully without the daily work of pulling up weeds and planting seeds? I must confess that I don’t get it. I don’t know why we think that the most comprehensive and long-term of all human relationships can stay alive and thrive without the same commitment we make to our gardens. Perhaps one of the fundamental sins that we all commit in our marriages is the sin of inattention… Is your marriage in some way a picture of neglect? Was it planted well? Has it been weeded and watered with regularity? Have you lacked the motivation to do the hard work of seeding and weeding and then stood back wondering why things don't look prettier than they do?” Pg. 101.
"[Many marriages are weedy, choking the life and love out of a marriage. We all are…] "weedy" people who need to pull personal and relational weeds daily so that the flowers of love and grace may grow. Sinners (which, in case you forgot, all of us are) always drag their sin into their marriages. Weeds of thought, decision, desire, motivation, word, action [and in action] cannot be completely avoided this side of heaven, so pulling weeds in the necessary commitment of any good marriage." Pg. 104.
My first response was: “OUCH!” If I am to love my wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25), then I need to actively create the proper environment for the garden of my marriage to grow and thrive. I need to own the condition of my garden. I need to weed my garden of my selfishness and sinfulness. Romans 14:19 states, “So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.” The challenge to myself and all of you is: “What weeds are in your garden?” Commit to identify them and commit to remove them.
by Michael Burner
Posted in Marriage
Recent
Archive
2023
January
WHO WANTS TO LIVE FOREVER?RESOLVING CONFLICT AND DEALING WITH EVILWHAT KIND OF FRUIT DO YOU HAVE?GOD IS PROUD OF HIS SONPEACE IS A FUNCTION OF FOCUSTHE HEALING POWER OF JESUSGOD CALLS YOU BY NAMESMOKE AND MIRRORSBE A LIGHTWISE WORDSEXODUSCHOOSING THE RIGHT PATHGOD SEES AND HEARSWHO IS THE GREATEST IN THE KINGDOM?WARNING AGAINST FOLLY
February
2022
January
February
A LEGACY OF FAITHHOW DO YOU APPROACH JESUS? GRUMBLING & COMPLAININGTHE STANDARD OF HOLINESSTHAT DOESN'T SOUND FUN!WHO IS A SINNER?JOY FROM READING THE BIBLEBETRAYING, DENYING & MEGOD'S BLESSINGSDO WE DENY KNOWING JESUS SOMETIMES?PASS THE LOCUSTS AND HONEY ...GOD'S RIGHTEOUSNESSTHE UNHOLY IS MADE HOLYWHO IS A GOD LIKE HIM?!?HEALTH INSPECTOR'S PERSPECTIVETHE MASTER OF TIMINGWHO IS THE GREATEST?
March
RECEIVE THE KINGDOM OF GOD LIKE A CHILD OR DO NOT ENTER!HOW DO YOU APPROACH JESUS?STANDARD OF HOLINESSPARABLE OF THE TENANTSTHE COMPLAINTS OF CHILDRENJUSTICE AND JESUSGOOD NEWSREADING AND PRAYING THE IMPRECATORY PSALMSHIS GRACE IS ENOUGH (Num. 24-25)WAITING ON THE LORDOUR LEGACYGOD PROVIDESPSALM 65ABSURD, INCOMPREHENSIBLE EVILA LAW BREAKER MEETS HIS SAVIORLOOKING BACK GIVES HOPE FOR WHAT'S AHEADONE LINERS
April
WHOM HAVE I IN HEAVEN BUT YOU?LIVING YOUR "BLESSED" LIFE NOWTHE PERFECT POSSESSION OF DILIGENCELUKE 15: LOST AND FOUNDHALLELUJAH! WHAT A SAVIOR!SEEK GOD WHEN MAKING DECISIONSTRUSTING GOD BRINGS VICTORYHOW WOULD YOU RESPOND?JESUS RIDES INTO TOWNFAINTING WITH FEAR ... OR RAISING OUR HEADS?ANXIOUS THOUGHTSA BRIEF MEDITATION ON PROVERBS 14:5THE GREATEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME
May
No Comments