Last week I was reading Wednesday’s Word by Paul Tripp. I found it in my inbox just after Manuel and I had an argument. In his blog, Paul reminded us readers of three basic truths in marriage. 1. We are conducting our marriage in a fallen world; 2. We are married to sinners; and 3. God is faithful, powerful and willing.

The part that God used to speak to me the most was the second truth. Here are Paul Tripp’s words:
You and I just don’t get to be married to someone perfect. It seems obvious when you read it, but how often do we forget it in our relationship’s mundane moments? You and your spouse contribute something destructive to what a marriage needs and must do. The Bible names it: sin. This is where the narrative of Scripture is so helpful. The world of the Bible is like your world—messy and broken. The people of the bible are like you and your spouse—weak and failing. The situations of the Bible are like yours—complicated and unexpected.  God’s honesty about the address where we live is itself and act of love and grace. He does this so we will be realistic in our expectations, then humbly reach out for the help that he alone can give us.
I read it with a grudge as I was processing the words exchanged between Manuel and I, and as I processed my part. I read it with anger, how dare Mr. Tripp send this one, this week (as if he’d know when we’ve had a disagreement). I read it and wept. I still want a fairy tale marriage. I still want a perfect spouse and I still get very upset when he is not prince charming; lastly, I still want so much to think of myself as better, less at fault than him at least. I still do not want to admit my weakness, my sin and my shortcomings. I still want to judge myself by my motives and Manuel by his actions.

Mr. Tripp is sharing these truths not because he and his wife cannot say of themselves that they have ‘won’ at this thing called marriage, but because they have been rescued by grace and wisdom over and over. It is with the same heart that I write.

I’ve been reading and meditating on Eph 2:1-10 the last couple of days. What a beautiful picture of God’s amazing grace. Today, verse 7 really stood out to me: So, God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus. It reminds me of Paul’s other words where he states he wants to hear God say, ‘well done, thy good and faithful servant…’

As marrieds, as people, let us be real about and own our weaknesses; Let us seek forgiveness when we have sinned, not just of our heavenly father, but from our spouse. Let us remember, our spouses are sinners saved by grace, just as we are. Let us be agents of God’s grace. May God use us as examples of the incredible wealth of His grace and kindness to our children, our families, and a watching world in need of God’s grace and salvation.

If you’d like to read the blog in its entirety, here is the link  https://manage.kmail-lists.com/subscriptions/web-view?a=RQjr56&c=UYQnnk&k=9aca1452577ecaae576b1d55baad19a0&m=T8u5Vj&r=xugfcrs

by Patti Calderon

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